Rukawa watched as the cab sped off, then at the brown envelope where his fingers clutched so hard that the paper was beginning to rip. He debated between just plain throwing it away or even deigning to look at it. There was no point now was there? Nothing in the envelope could change what had happened, or change his mind.
His eyes narrowed to himself as he walked upstairs, throwing the envelope down on the bed. Throughout the evening, his eyes strayed towards it, and finally, he reached for it and tore open the seal.
"What is this," he muttered to himself, his hands sifting through the documents and his mind on nothing in particular. "Sendoh Akira, what are you trying to pull…"
A small cardboard card in the midst of the file, stapled neatly onto a pink slip of paper, caught his eye and he picked it out and read the words on it. "What's this, Akira, science lesson?" he muttered to himself, before an ominous feeling sank over him and his gaze slowly land on the top of the page where, in neat inked handwriting, was the name Sakuragi Hanamichi.
He gripped the cardboard so tightly he crushed it. This can't be true…
He flipped through the rest of the documents, and his stomach tightened with every word he read. In between the white sheets was a small newspaper cutting. Boy robbed of job earnings. The name was unfamiliar, but the words 'not his real name' were circled with a bright red pen.
His heart sank to the pits of his soul, and shock and realization replaced dumbfounded confusion. So that's why…that night…he wouldn't let me…
His thoughts raced unchecked, flooding his mind.
Why didn't you ever tell me, Hanamichi? I never knew what had changed you from last year. So this was it. You were taken and you were given a death sentence, and you couldn't tell anyone. I don't know how Sendoh came into the picture though. Why did you tell him, and not me? Are you in love with him?
AIDS…so that's why you're always coughing, aren't you? And why I always see your eyes glaze over, even when you don't know I'm watching you. That's why you walk as if in pain sometimes, and that's why you can't even move in a straight line now, isn't it?
I can't believe you never told me. Why wouldn't you?
And the answer came to him, choking him as he let the papers fall to the floor.
Did you think I wouldn't love you anymore? Or did you think I was worth better? Did you abandon me, god damn you Hanamichi, because you thought you couldn't give me everything I needed, because you were sick? How dare you!
Anger flooded him now.
You're the only person I could think of opening up to, do'aho. You and your stupid naïve nature, your honesty, your lack of deception and scheming. You're like pure sunshine, uncontrolled and direct. Yet in this one matter where everything you were played a factor, you chose to let that part of yourself die?
You let me leave you?! His mind was screaming at him.
Rising, he grabbed his jacket, reached down to swipe the cardboard with the pink slip and place it in his pocket, before striding from the room with determination and purpose in his cold blue eyes.
End of part 8