"Well, Sakuragi Hanamichi, if you're feeling much better you don't always have to stop by and see me, you know!"
Warm eyes twinkled at him from behind black-rimmed glasses as Doctor Onosaki scribbled the prescription on the card. Hanamichi smiled back. "All right." They rose to leave.
"Oh, Sendoh?" Doctor Onosaki distractedly called, "Can you stay a moment? There's something about your record I need to clean up."
Hanamichi patted Sendoh's hand. "I'll just go sit outside with Rukawa for a bit. You go ahead." The door opened and swung close behind him, but the coughing could be heard all the way. Sendoh moved forward and sat down.
The cheer disappeared from the older man's eyes, to be filled with sympathy and sorrow.
"That will probably be the last batch of antibiotics he gets," he said at last.
Sendoh looked straight at him for a long moment.
"I understand," he replied softly. Doctor Onosaki nodded and looked away.
@@@
As usual, Hanamichi was the first to be sent home. Rukawa sat in the cab with a sudden and unusually wordless Sendoh. He had been making merry conversation all the way, but the moment Hanamichi alighted, the atmosphere in the cab turned to one of gloom. Rukawa ignored him and looked out the window, watching the houses flash by. He knew what the doctor had wanted to say to Sendoh when Hanamichi had walked out of the consultation room alone. And his mind simply refused to accept it.
Stay by me
And make the moment last
Please take these lips
Even if I have been kissed
A million times
And I don't care if there is no tomorrow
When I could die here in your arms
Even if the stars have made us blind
We're blind we're blind
So blind in love
@@@
He was dead three months later. Looking at his peaceful face through the glass that separated them, Rukawa felt his icy veneer threaten to give way and shatter. Flashes of merry laughter, of passionate nights, of comforting moments ran around and around in his head. He looked around. There were so many people there. He hadn't realized that the do'aho had known so many people. The entire basketball team was there, as well as the guntai, and in the corner a spiky-haired boy lounged on the bench. So many students from the school, including one of the canteen vendors and the form teacher. Relatives, crowding him, making the place claustrophobic. He turned abruptly and left the parlor.
And there are voices that want to be heard. So much to mention but you can't find the words. The scent of magic, the beauty that's been when love was wilder than the wind.
Walking outside to clear his head, he sat down on the pavement and fixed his gaze on the distant horizon.
They had never told anyone, Hanamichi, Sendoh or him. He hadn't wanted anyone to know, and be treated differently. But with them, he could live. He lighted up and cheered and breathed every moment as though he knew he was running out of them fast.
He recalled watching his lover worsening before his eyes, and he remembered one thing that Hanamichi had said the morning they had woken up, seemingly such a short time ago, in each other's arms. The redhead had looked at him, thinking he was asleep, and touched his lips with his own gently. Why would you choose to love… What's in a feeling?
End of part 10